Ice Cream Lady

Song Credit: Parody of Ice Cream Man as performed by Van Halen and David Lee Roth.

Now showtime’s here, gotta song to make you drool
Oh, showtime’s here, gotta song to make you drool
Better watch your heart rate, Dil’s got somethin' for you

{Glamor armor suddenly changes to a skimpy midriff ~ bustier ~ g-string outfit}
{spoken quickly} Tell ya what it is {with big grin and a wink}
{as the next verse begins, start to dance with plenty of shaking and suggestive movements}

I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
You know my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy

{quick riff}

I got lemon squeezies and coconuts
Cherries flavored with honey dew
I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
You know my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy

{strumming riff} {for the next verse, pick up the pace and vigor of dance, increase in lurid tone}

Well I dance by while you all hold your – socks! {Eyes go wide}
Well I dance by while you all hold your – socks! {Big leering grin!}
If you get a taste, you’ll never gonna wanna stop!
{in a teasing/burlesque/coquettish manner, dance away from the crowd, wagging a finger}
{hard chord, strummed a few times, syncopated}

I got sweet papayas and coconuts
Cherry flavor on my honey dew
I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
You know my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy

{strumming increases in tempo to a more suggestive and vigorous dance/burlesque move}

I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
I'm your ice cream lady, watch me as I dance by
Now all my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy!

{lots of vocal flourishes on ‘guaranteed’ and an extended ‘fiiiiii’ to end the song}
{Strike one last suggestive/coquettish pose as the guitar strums a final strain}
{Stage goes dark ~ light cantrip goes out}

Credit: Dilligas Husty, AKA KorvinStarmast and used by permission